Evolution- How do I work around it?

So...okay. Those of us with addiction are battling millions of year of brain evolution. The brain is exquisitely primed to seek euphoria... and then later avoid the pain of withdrawal/or being sick. 

In my case, years ago booze got me high. Then it stopped working. I didn't get high from booze any more, but physical withdrawal created pain and seizures...  I'm essentially a slave when I'm when I'm actively drinking... chasing the memory of getting high, or running away from the nasty pain and sickness from withdrawal. 

Scientifically, brain-wise my dopamine levels are permanently fucked. Very simply -dopamine EQUALS motivation.

Moreover,  I learned, OBESITY is usually coupled with low dopamine levels, and the rare, small dopamine booster- eating; highjack our desire to calorie control; and lack of dopamine/motivation results in no physical activity/exercising...

In my case. I have no motivation to do anything: showering, working out, calling my friends, dealing with other adults, leaving my apartment, reading my mail. 

So my goals are super realistic at this point. I know I'm NOT going to be impressive to anyone else- not the Empress-Mother, the princess-Sister, my civilian very accomplished friends...

I'm going to watch my ability to overcome my lack of motivation. one thing at a time.  Right now it's going to be going to work, listening to music and walking for 10 minutes.

Not sure how long I'm going to keep this goal. at this moment, it seems IMPOSSIBLE. 

I certainly don't feel like it. and I'm aware my deficient brain won't let me FEEL better as a result. But I know it will BE better. 

I will learn to accept it. This is me moving forward. 

This, for your Darling Scrub, along with Sobriety, is success.