Starting Over, But Not From Scratch

I've been told I clean up nicely, but I wear a wife-beater everyday. Hopefully my truth is more fashion forward.

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Wednesday, March 18, 2026

April 4th reflection.

 We see our fellows model unselfishness and we see how to do it ourselves. Question: Am I now depending less on myself and more on god?   Meditation is on getting to know yourself so that i can help others.  

Friday April 3rd reflection

 drinking, we were absolutely selfish. Question: Can I now look beyond my own selfishness?   Loaded loaded loaded. selfishness is my biggest problems.

meditate on: the first quality of greatness is service. A life of a service is the finest life we can live.  Service is the beginning and the end of what is valid about our new lives.

Thursday April 2nd reflection

 Next family and friends, have you been better with them? More loving? Do i really care about other people?"  authentically it's the true acid test. If we are unselfish things will orient themselves properly. Meditation teases out the idea, that we can be a force for good.  once we are changed by gods grace, we can be then be ultimately used for his purpose. 

In time you even throw this garment away and exchange it for a even more divine one.

Wednesday April 1st reflection

 more on our foundation and becoming more honest? Have i admitted to the extent that i cannot and god can and i should let him?  It's a foundation that requires humility.  Humility is one of my biggest struggles. I' m arrogant.

 The question is deep, "Am I beginning to find out what it means to be alive and to face the world honestly and without fear?" 

They say fear and faith can't exist in the same. and humanly nothing good happens without god. Something to work out in meditation.

March 31st reflection

 Since I've been in AA have I made a start toward being more unselfish? Yes. because this hits to the core of my disease. our meditation focuses on daily small practice. God sees our progress, even if we don't see it in ourselves. trust that God will  see things fairly. God judges your heart. it's something to stay focused on.

march 30th reflection

 Before AA we we unloving. Question: Have I gotten over loving nobody but myself? That is a big one. Honestly self centeredness is still a problem. I still suffer from my disease. ism I, self and me.  it's the core of my sickness. there is always something I want to say; someway I need to be heard; my opinions are so important. Obviously that is so untrue. and the weirdest thing is how i hold on to the delusion.   Meditation: be calm, be true, be quiet. Another good few minutes of quiet reflection. 

Sunday march 29th reflection

 reflection question: Am I know really honest?  So much more than before. Meditation: I must live in the world and yet live apart from God. I can go forth from my secret times of commune with god to the work of the world. And for me it works. I'm more powerful, because i have handed my load over. Nothing in the world should seriously upset me, as long as my inner life is lived with God. All successful living arises from this inner life.