Motive is everything

I'm sitting in church. Not to worship. I'm supposed to be here. Good is important, my guy is important. Being good is important. I'd rather be in bed, sleeping.

I'm not paying attention. I'm fat. Irritable.

Y amazing guy loves me even though I'm fat.

My daughter is taking too me and note I'm obsessed with her problems. I want to fix everything.

Let's make it elegant

And take the tangles out of my values.

Be recovery about it.

What is the/my primary purpose? To be healthy, pleasing to God, and walk through
What is NOT the/my p primary purpose?
What is in my shelter?
What actions to avoid?
What questions do I have?
What are my goals?

I have a commute.

So it's really long... I'm praying to make these 20 hours a week the most productive... Ever!

So I can: improve my French, Spanish, big book, my blog, discover music. Actually read.

Luminosity puzzles to get smarter

Oh yeah. And do some t shirts. I need to download some tutorials from my GIMP....

Lots ta do. But I also don't want to be exhausted.... Just the opposite I want to be energized.

FunkyScrubJunior called

Called at two in the morning. He never calls. I was able to ask if everything was alright. He called to hear my voice. We didn't talk about anything, and we could talk about everything. He shared personal stuff.

It was the best call I've had this year.

I feel so loved.

I don't deserve it.

Grams

My grams died in South America her original home last week.

I went to a funeral upstate today. Unrelated but I think God didn't mind that I used the priests words. I thought of this woman I love so much and was grateful to be in g house to think of her.

I was fortunate to love this woman. Be loved by her and know that her life was long and purposeful in all the ways that are not bull.

He life was full of stories and work and thoughtfulness and love. I'm glad she saw me sober. I'm glad she made fun of every lover I had.

More about her later. As it turns out there are two funerals and I need to be on my way.